I am in my mid thirties with one gorgeous child, who is smart, funny and everything we could have ever wished for. I have had a career break for several years and however during this time I set up a small business to work from home to earn some money but also keep my brain active.
I am conscious that the old biological clock is ticking but also I have been out of the wider world of work for a long time and worry if I leave it too late I won't be able to have a good solid career, which will challenge and excite me.
Mr H and I have gone round and round in circles trying to decide whether we should have a second child or whether we should stick as we are. We have gone through the usual conversations about feeling selfish if we only have one as we are denying our daughter the chance to have a sibling who she could become great friends with.
Being a mum these days is so very different to the time when my mum stayed at home. We were raised being told we could achieve anything - go to university and have a great career. I was ambitious and I did all those things, but nobody told me how hard it would be once you have a child what happens then?
Do you ditch all your hard work and ambitions to stay at home and devote 100% of your time to your children? Do you work part time and try and have the best of both worlds? or do you go for full time and feel wracked with guilt that you are not looking after your little ones properly?
I love being a mum and I will cherish all the magical moments Miss H and I have shared together whilst we were at home. Believe me we have had lots of fun and created memories we will both have for always. The question is can I do it again? or is my desire to get back into a suit stronger? If I delay my career for another two years will I feel frustrated or will everything just work out fine?
I am really unsure where to turn at the moment and what decision to make.
The joys of being a modern mum.
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